BREAKTHROUGH AFTER HEARTBREAK – PART 4 – RISING SOBER ON THE WINGS OF GOD’S MERCY;
She began to create distance between us. I could feel it. Long before the silence, she had changed. I knew what was happening.
It ripped me apart.
Eventually, there was no contact. I kept replaying everything, every conversation, every gesture and at one point I kept rereading through our messages on Facebook Messenger, wondering what I could have done differently.
I knew where I went wrong and the guilt weighed heavily on me. Maybe if I had done it, we would still be together.
Even though I had stopped drinking, I was still smoking cigarettes. I wasn’t fully clean and felt like I hadn’t given myself to her fully. There’s always something when I’m in a relationship that holds me back. This feeling pervaded my next relationship. Still, I couldn’t give myself fully.
She later told me that she knew that I was smoking but she liked me…
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